A Concern and Question
Hey Peipei-
Don’t know if you will respond to this or not, but I’m hoping. I’m a 22-year-old white girl, and I feel stuck, for I live in this small town in Oregon (Corvallis, and attending Oregon State University). I can’t live with out a beat, a rhythm—something I can move to, rock to, breathe to. For me, a good beat will give me a high, and I feel it completes part of who I am. I’ve always been drawn to hip hop, and my dance has always had a street feel to it… I also longboard, and similarly, it’s that connection with the earth that I crave. (I’m also probably one of just three serious female long boarders on this campus of 18,000 students).
I met a guy this year from Alabama who is a b-boy. When he introduced me to his style of breaking, I knew that that was what I was supposed to be doing, what I had been supposed to be doing my whole life, I just never knew specifically what it was. When I saw him dance, I felt like I had found part of me. For I also saw in b-boying (or b-girling) the attitude, the confidence, the mind set: “this is me, I do what I do, and that’s how it is.” And that is how I have always lived my life, and that is the only way I can live my life; and music and dance are the only ways that I can express who I am. That’s why I feel like my whole life I’ve always been a b-girl, I just didn’t know what to call it.
I feel like an outsider; I don’t fit in at this school, I don’t fit in anywhere. But I’m 22, and I’m scared I’m discovering breaking too late. I’m gonna push myself through this alone, because I don’t know anyone at this school, except for this one guy, with whom to jam with. But, it sucks doing this alone, cause I believe dance and music are supposed to be shared, they are at the heart of community—I just wish I had a community. I know there are things I can work on, like improving my upper body strength, tumbling… there are resources I can make use of here. I just, need… or hope… to hear what you would do in my situation. What did you do to motivate yourself, to have the courage to keep going, to find the strength to be your true self, and to accept yourself as who you are? I know my whole life I will have to prove myself, and my whole life I will have to fight sterotypes and being boxed in. My friends don’t understand how music and dance are such an integral part of my heart and my identity, and none of them share my passion for it, so I’m stuck doing it alone. Others only stereotype me as a serious student. People were shocked to find out that I was a longboarder, and are always even more surprised to find out that I can dance. They just assume that I can’t possibly have that interest because they only see the scholastic side of me, and very few know this b-girl side of me. Annnnddd, I feel like I’m supposed to go to grad school after I graduate, but all I really want to do right now is skate and dance---it’s all just a lot of shit. Hahaha. Oh gosh.
When I get down, I often listen to Lauryn Hill, she helps. But, I’m scared I’ve wasted so much of my life when I should have been dancing, when I should have been a b-girl. I’m scared I’ve found out, too late, a part of who I am. And I’m scared to lose it.
Thank you for reading this,
Mollie
Corvallis, Oregon
holmesmo@onid.orst.edu
MY RESPONSE:
mollie
this response is really quick, it's 130 am
i wll write more to you later but for now here's a
quick response
i'd like to post your letter an dmy response on my
website with yourpermission
i feel like other girls might want to know about your
feelings on this too
well i started when I was barely 24. Dos that make you
feel a little better?
Rokafella, one of the most amazing bgirls in the world
who lives in NY, was my inspiration, she was 23 when
she started and I met her when she was 28.
so you're waaaay ahead!!!!!
don't even trip
most of the bgirls tend to be a little older, since
breaking i feel is a more advance ddance form that we
are used to, growing up in jazz, modern, hip hop
choreography type dancing. etc.
the way i see it, you've got plenty of time.
i felt exactly the same way when i was 24 and started.
that I was a bgirl at heart from the minute i was
born. i started dancing in ciphers at the age of 1 in
diapers at my parents dinner parties!
there are bboy sin oregon, i dont' know off hand right
now but try to find some.
it seems you've got some leads....
start a break club in your school!!!
i long board a little tooo!!
who is the guy from alabama?!?!?
watch videos if there are not many bboys there!
find the good music, i'm busy at heck but i know there
are tons of lists online of bboy songs you should
know.
being an outsider is an idea of perception. if you
FEEL like an outsider, you will only make yourself an
outsider and that
Don’t know if you will respond to this or not, but I’m hoping. I’m a 22-year-old white girl, and I feel stuck, for I live in this small town in Oregon (Corvallis, and attending Oregon State University). I can’t live with out a beat, a rhythm—something I can move to, rock to, breathe to. For me, a good beat will give me a high, and I feel it completes part of who I am. I’ve always been drawn to hip hop, and my dance has always had a street feel to it… I also longboard, and similarly, it’s that connection with the earth that I crave. (I’m also probably one of just three serious female long boarders on this campus of 18,000 students).
I met a guy this year from Alabama who is a b-boy. When he introduced me to his style of breaking, I knew that that was what I was supposed to be doing, what I had been supposed to be doing my whole life, I just never knew specifically what it was. When I saw him dance, I felt like I had found part of me. For I also saw in b-boying (or b-girling) the attitude, the confidence, the mind set: “this is me, I do what I do, and that’s how it is.” And that is how I have always lived my life, and that is the only way I can live my life; and music and dance are the only ways that I can express who I am. That’s why I feel like my whole life I’ve always been a b-girl, I just didn’t know what to call it.
I feel like an outsider; I don’t fit in at this school, I don’t fit in anywhere. But I’m 22, and I’m scared I’m discovering breaking too late. I’m gonna push myself through this alone, because I don’t know anyone at this school, except for this one guy, with whom to jam with. But, it sucks doing this alone, cause I believe dance and music are supposed to be shared, they are at the heart of community—I just wish I had a community. I know there are things I can work on, like improving my upper body strength, tumbling… there are resources I can make use of here. I just, need… or hope… to hear what you would do in my situation. What did you do to motivate yourself, to have the courage to keep going, to find the strength to be your true self, and to accept yourself as who you are? I know my whole life I will have to prove myself, and my whole life I will have to fight sterotypes and being boxed in. My friends don’t understand how music and dance are such an integral part of my heart and my identity, and none of them share my passion for it, so I’m stuck doing it alone. Others only stereotype me as a serious student. People were shocked to find out that I was a longboarder, and are always even more surprised to find out that I can dance. They just assume that I can’t possibly have that interest because they only see the scholastic side of me, and very few know this b-girl side of me. Annnnddd, I feel like I’m supposed to go to grad school after I graduate, but all I really want to do right now is skate and dance---it’s all just a lot of shit. Hahaha. Oh gosh.
When I get down, I often listen to Lauryn Hill, she helps. But, I’m scared I’ve wasted so much of my life when I should have been dancing, when I should have been a b-girl. I’m scared I’ve found out, too late, a part of who I am. And I’m scared to lose it.
Thank you for reading this,
Mollie
Corvallis, Oregon
holmesmo@onid.orst.edu
MY RESPONSE:
mollie
this response is really quick, it's 130 am
i wll write more to you later but for now here's a
quick response
i'd like to post your letter an dmy response on my
website with yourpermission
i feel like other girls might want to know about your
feelings on this too
well i started when I was barely 24. Dos that make you
feel a little better?
Rokafella, one of the most amazing bgirls in the world
who lives in NY, was my inspiration, she was 23 when
she started and I met her when she was 28.
so you're waaaay ahead!!!!!
don't even trip
most of the bgirls tend to be a little older, since
breaking i feel is a more advance ddance form that we
are used to, growing up in jazz, modern, hip hop
choreography type dancing. etc.
the way i see it, you've got plenty of time.
i felt exactly the same way when i was 24 and started.
that I was a bgirl at heart from the minute i was
born. i started dancing in ciphers at the age of 1 in
diapers at my parents dinner parties!
there are bboy sin oregon, i dont' know off hand right
now but try to find some.
it seems you've got some leads....
start a break club in your school!!!
i long board a little tooo!!
who is the guy from alabama?!?!?
watch videos if there are not many bboys there!
find the good music, i'm busy at heck but i know there
are tons of lists online of bboy songs you should
know.
being an outsider is an idea of perception. if you
FEEL like an outsider, you will only make yourself an
outsider and that

